112: 14.1 The Elderly

*Details in this post are partly fictitious*

That’s it. Finished the streak of 12 hour shifts for now. It wasn’t as bad as previous experiences. At least there were 3 junior doctors on the ward as opposed to the time where I was the only one handling a 28 patient ward on my own. So on balance, I have a lot to be grateful for Alhamdulillah.

However, an encounter with a few of my patients’ offsprings during medical take was a bit off putting. During my short stint in geriatrics, I have come to realise but not appreciate the differences in culture between the East and the West regarding the care of elderly persons in our respective families. When my mother in law was recovering after her heart operation, all her children (and even extended family) banded together and took turns taking care of her during her stay in hospital and many weeks afterwards at home. The family made up her physiotherapist, cook, carer, nurse and driver whilst she was gaining her strength at home. Even in hospital, the brothers took turns to sleep in with her overnight, just to ensure that she was never alone. When one is in need, one can always rely on family.

It is hard to compare that with what I encounter on a daily basis at work here. Here are a few of my patients: an elderly gentleman who lives alone who can’t go home because he fractured his shoulder and there is no one to help him eat, drink or dress. An elderly lady who was rushed back into A&E by her daughter after merely hours of being discharged from hospital because she can’t manage the stairs alone.

I might be a tad judgemental, but it is so hard to empathise with people who don’t care about those who raised you. Those who would have given up a limb and all the money in the world for you. And it is hard to come to work and see so many patients who have been medically well for so many weeks - and they are just there on the wards because there is no one to care for them at home. It is just sad and disgraceful. And we should all be ashamed of ourselves. To quote the nurse on my ward today, “Nobody takes care of their families anymore. They just don’t care.” Preach sister, preach.