133: 4.2 Hours

I wish there are more hours in some days, and less in others. On working days, there is little opportunity to do things that you want outside of the 9-5 grind. My typical routine nowadays after work is to get back home at 6, shower and cook something to eat which would take me to 8pm. Then I would relax, watch some things online. Then maybe spend half an hour to one hour writing. Then maybe spend several minutes studying for my theory driving test which is quickly approaching. That would take me to 11.00pm when I would talk to A on facetime before getting ready for bed, and the cycle would repeat itself the next day. There is very little scope physically or time-wise for perhaps learning a new skill, or reading or revising for specialist exams or exercising. Unless I opt to sleep less hours, and I am far from committing to that sacrifice.

Then there are days where I have nothing planned at all. I wake up at noon and laze my day away till nightfall around 5pm. Only then I would start being somewhat productive before giving up when I realise that I am never productive during weekends. I count the dreary hours, filling it with nonsensical entertainment and superficial television, till its the weekday again, when time would hopefully tick on faster. But like days like today when A is around and we have friends to meet and places to go, I wish that there were more hours that span my work-less weekend. No I did nothing productive today except writing this entry, but it was time well spent - especially important for my emotional health.

Yesterday at dinner with an old friend we realised that 10 years ago, I was in high school. TEN. YEARS. Its now in the double digits, and that is absolutely frightening. Where did all those years go?  How could it already be ten years? In a blink of an eye, it came and went. But in contrast, there are times especially nearing the clock-off times from long weekend on-call shifts, where 5 minutes feel like an eternity. I would watch the hand of the clock tick from second to second, just wishing it would hurry up.

I know that time is a fixed entity. There are 60 seconds in a minute, 60 minutes in an hour and 24 hours in a day. That is how the world works. But I believe there is also an inherent fluidity to time. A subjective aspect to it where two people can experience the same hour in totally different ways. Fast, slow or somewhere in between. And I guess this is one gem of many in life that ought to be appreciated.