I am currently enjoying one of the few annual leave days I have been granted, Alhamdulillah. It seems strange to wake up at 10 or 11 in the morning - it is a luxury to slowly wake up according to one's body clock rather than being suddenly jolted from slumber by an arrogant alarm. With a cup of hot tea, I spent the morning listening to Nouman Ali Khan going through the ayats of Surah Baqarah. Today he went through the importance of bayyinah (evidence) and huda (guidance), and why learning the religion in that order is important.
In many Muslim families, the what and how to be a Muslim is very much emphasised. How we pray, how we make wudhu' and how we fast. At the same time, we are constantly reminded to what is haram and halal. Pork and alchol... haram. HMC certified meats... halal! But through the barrage of rules and practices, we often are not taught to ponder "Why Islam?"
Allah swt in the Quran mentioned bayyinah first with reason - because once the evidence of why Islam is truth is established in one's heart, only then does the hows and the whats make sense. Being born into the religion, like many others, I have taken my religion to be just a set of regulations for most of my teenage years. Inspired by the lecture today, I sat down with a pen and paper and wrote down the reasons of "Why Islam?"
Firstly, I had to break up the question up into two parts.
Part one: Is there a God?
Signs in Nature
There is an abundance of signs around us for those who stop and ponder. From the tiniest creations of atoms to the largest of mountains and the vastness of solar systems, when I stop and think about the diversity of things around me, I become overwhelmed. For instance, despite the magnificent advances in medicine, we have yet to fully understand how human bodies work. What we know might just be the tip of a very vast iceberg with many thousands of diseases yet to be discovered, let alone cure. If we are far from understanding the foundations of our own selves, how are we able to truly understand the mechanics of how the entire universe operates?
People might argue that all of this happened by chance. From the big bang to today, complex and diverse beings have just learned to evolve naturally from the simplest forms of life such as bacteria. Although this view is held in many scientific circles, I find it very hard to believe that all of this happened by chance. If there wasn't a higher power Who not only created, but also controlled the nature of things, I would argue that the world will be laden with chaos. It was as if a factory of different machines were suddenly switched on with no central controller. Or like a computer with millions of lines of code without a programmer to instruct on how the code should be used.
With even simple things like oxygen - a necessity for life - the planet would need enough sunlight (but not too much), the right temperature for plants to grow, the right nutrients in the soil which will require animals, enough rain throughout the year, (which will require enough water in the sea), diverse types of seeds for different weather and enough wind to propagate the seeds (which requires just enough gravitational pull from the moon and sun). All these factors need to be just right to allow oxygen to be produced to sustain life. And I find it hard to believe that all these factors just came together by pure chance. It must have been orchestrated, every puzzle piece rightly put in its place by a Higher Power.
After establishing belief in God, the second question to ask is why did I choose this religion? After mulling it over, I came up with 5 reasons why.
Part two: Why Islam?
The Quran
As Muslims, we believe that the Quran is the word of God. Word from word, untarnished by time. Unlike other Books in the Abrahamic faith, there is no one in between you and the word of God in the Quran. It is not made of scholar's interpretations of scripture, the Quran is divine scripture. There is no early or late testaments, the message in the Quran rings true through time and place. It was sent down through a Messenger (saw) who didn't know how to read or write. As he was illiterate, it would have been impossible for him to structure passages as beautifully symmetrical and lyrical as what is in the Quran. Plus, the Quran was not revealed in chronological order! Although others might still want more evidence to its Truth, for me, these facts is sufficient for me to conclude that the Quran must be Divine.
On a personal level, reading and reflecting on the Quran, it feels like Allah swt is talking directly at me, with words He specifically chose to reach my heart. Each word hold multitudes of layers to its meaning, as relevant today as it was many centuries ago. And as much as its a gift of guidance filled with advice on how to behave and think through the ups and downs of life, the Quran also acts as an emergency landline - one that I can turn to in times of difficulty and uncertainty.
The Character of Rasulullah (pbuh)
Secondly, I am Muslim because I want to emulate Prophet Muhammad (pbuh). Learning more of his life (pbuh), I begin to understand more and more why Allah swt chose him for this mission. Growing up, he (pbuh) was a truthful, kind and spiritual man. A person that people could constantly rely on, he sought solace in being in solidarity. When thrusted with the responsibility of delivering the Message, at first, he was riddled with fear - fear that he was not good enough. He sought refuge in his wife who consoled him that God had chosen him for a reason. From then on, his (pbuh) story is filled with triumph, but also much hardship, loss and sacrifice. He faced calamity with kindness and humility - never failing to reflect inwards.
When kids were throwing stones at him (pbuh) until blood was trickling down to his shoes, he sought forgiveness from Allah swt. Not for the kids who threw stones, but forgiveness for himself - for not being a good enough Messenger, one that people respected enough. How humble must one be to blame oneself and not others even if the fault is not one's own?
His (pbuh) beautiful character shined through his history - a source for every man, woman and child to emulate. From how he worshipped Allah swt, to how he was as a leader, a husband and a father, there are scores of important lessons from his life. And his legacy, which has completely changed the course of the world through the spread of Islam, is only kept alive through us.
The Justice of the Hereafter
My number three reason why I am Muslim is my belief that there must be true justice. In Islam, we believe that everyone is fairly trialled by God on Judgement Day when every deed, good or bad, will be taken into account. In contrast to the world we live in now, where corruption is rife, police brutality is common and those with money and power escape punishment with not more than a pat on the hand, I find it difficult to digest that those who do and spread evil can get away with what they have done. Those who work in corporations who capitalise by lawfully misguiding vulnerable groups, or those who sexually abuse young people and children, or those who kill people for the colour of their skin or those who sit idle in parliament lobbying for less strict gun laws despite the recurring events of mass school shootings.
There must ultimately be justice - not in the hands of a corrupt judge who is open to bias, greed and power. But in the hands of the Most Just. He who knows your true intentions of your actions. He who not only sees the evil you can propagate, but also sees the good deeds you spread. He who, on Judgement Day, will reward those who spread love and charity in silence. No billboards, no pictures on social media, no newspaper articles on how "generous" he or she was. No one, but Allah swt knew your work. And on the flip side, to those whose hands were involved in corruption and lies, He has plans for you as well.
In the end, life is not fair and it is never going to be. But thankfully, God is.
Dependence on God
During an afternoon run, I was listening to a podcast where a scholar mentioned that one's faith is measured by one's reliance on God. You are only as strong as your dependence on God, and as weak as your dependence on yourself. When I heard this, it truly hit home for me for I have always been a planner and relied on myself. There is a Plan A, B, C, etc for everything in life - and it is through orchestrating these plans that I have somewhat gained apparent control over my life. But however well I plan for myself, I have always been blindsided by how my plans will never fully manifest itself and I am left anxiously derailed.
Everything from scholarships to college, from gap years to universities, extra degrees, marriage, from work to homes, nothing has ever worked out as planned. At every turning point and crossroads, God has swooped in and said "I know you have planned for that, but this is better for you, Ayne." And with a guiding hand, He has led my anxious self to better paths in life - ones that despite my extensive research and preparation, would have never known existed. Paths that have filled me with the great company of friends and families, safe environments on different continents and diverse intellectual and emotional challenges. It is through Islam that I have learnt to couple hard work and my reliance of God. And for the balance that that has opened my life to, I am grateful.
Freedom
My last reason for why Islam is because the religion has gifted me with freedom. At first glance, it might be a contradictory statement - Islam and freedom. Don't you have to eat halal, and stay off alcohol and wear the hijab? However, the freedom of choice is not what I am referring to. An ex-navy seal commander and motivational speaker, Jocko Willink, once said in a video that discipline equals freedom.
It is a hard concept to grasp, but he breaks it down through a few examples. For instance, physical freedom in old age can only be achieved through discipline in carrying out regular exercise and consuming a healthy diet, financial freedom can only be achieved through disciplined spending and more free time can be achieved through disciplined planning and use of time. It takes discipline to achieve freedom - that is why Buddhist monks wake up early and meditate day after day to cleanse their body from worldly ties.
Through Islam, I have realised that ultimate freedom is not retirement, but being granted access to Jannah after I die. And to achieve this freedom will take tremendous self restraint and discipline throughout life. However, working towards that goal doesn't mean I am otherwise shackled in this life either. Through doing work in propagating truth and good, life's freedom comes from seeking acknowledgement from God, and no one else. It is being free from the pressures and influences of society and one's own ego which is ever fleeting, itself influenced by the latest popular trends and craze.
Especially being an Asian, Muslim female professional, there are many expectations of how I should behave by different pockets of the community. May it be how I dress (as it is much debated by European governments), to what language I should speak (more Malay if I was back home in Malaysia) and to when I should start having a family (earlier back home, but later in the West). These views and expectations change so rapidly that I fail to keep up with them. There are also influences stemmed from my own desires - desire for wealth, power and status.
In contrast, the expectations from my Creator are permanent and constant, and by focusing on seeking acknowledgement from Him and only Him, I feel liberated, not only from the pressures of society, I also feel liberated from the desires of my own ego.
**
In the end, there are many reasons why I choose Islam, but here are the ones that I have tried to put into words. This has definitely strengthened my conviction in my faith so I urge you, the reader, to do the same and ask yourself: "Why do you believe what you believe?"
