200: 12.4 Friends

There are many who I have the privilege of knowing for a decade or more, some who I have even known since birth. They have witnessed them grow from giggly school children to awkward teenagers to our current stage in life where we are trying to navigate ourselves through adulthood. They too have seen me gone through the same journey. I know their families, and they know mine. You know that you are good friends when we ask each other, "How is your mom? Is your dad still busy pursuing that hobby of his? Is your grandmother well? How is your sister coping with school?"

They are the friends who have active conversations on social media with your parents and grandmother through comment sections. Sometimes, even more than you do! They were there for when you were blowing the candles off of your 12th birthday cake and they were also there when you took your first official steps as a wife. Some accompanied you through the loneliness of being abroad and have seen you through to university and now to work. Amongst the constant changes of home addresses, colleagues, jobs and fashion styles, they have been some of the constant constants in life. And you feel so lucky to still be rewarded with their presence in your life.

Sometimes I wonder whether there is a point to forming new friendships if I already have them? The induction of becoming newly found friends involves the sometimes painful and dreary process of a lot of small talk, niceties and baseless praise. Some make friends ever so easily, but I have always found difficulties that are hard to shake off.

But I find hope in knowing that my forever friends now did start off as strangers many years ago. Through trial and error, I have learnt that friendships that are worth fighting for always start from ground zero and takes effort and time for its strong foundations to be built. Many times, those same foundations which you thought would survive any weather may start to form cracks. Some may just crumble back to ground zero. But there are those that strongly stand tall for many years despite the neglect.

For every relationship to survive, you must commit to working on it. That maybe in the form of having a sleepover once a year, or that may involve a text or an email ever so often. Or maybe a simple dinner once in a while. Friendships created are only sustained with the time and work you put into it.

So for all my forever friends whom I had the pleasure of catching up with (and those who I didn't get the chance to) these past few weeks, I am honoured to (still) be in your lives. Please reconsider me for the same friendship position next year.